Column: Can you sit down with the corn on the cob?

I know quite a few people who are very afraid of clowns, others who freak out over snakes, and a few that let out a blood-curdling shriek if they see even the most harmless spider.

I am not a fan of the previously mentioned trio, either. When I was around 10, my grandma gave me a clown doll for my birthday, and thinking of it sitting in my room at night still freaks me out. I swear that thing would come alive at night and try to steal my breath.

As much as I was not a fan of that clown, I would not say it was a phobia. It was a creepy gift for a kid expecting a baseball bat or glove.

I’m not sure what I will describe would be considered phobias, but a few things make me very nervous, and I was reminded of this while recently attending a parade.

I attended the Sweetwater County Fair in my hometown every year during my childhood. There was always a carnival, which was great fun, but I was not too fond of one thing about the event.

Around the same age I received that awful clown, I started to get horrendous anxiety when I would attend the fair and see people walking around while they ate corn on the cob. I have no idea why this gets me out of sorts, but it does. There was a stand at the fair that just sold corn on the cob, so walking down the midway was a house of horrors. It would quickly turn the best night of socializing or visiting the carnival into a bummer in moments.

It was bizarre because if the people sat down at ate their corn, I would not have a problem, but the moment they stood up and started moving around, I would get nervous. I probably should have visited a doctor about this, but I figured this really isn’t something I have to deal with all the time. Perhaps it would be different if I lived in Iowa or Nebraska.

I have only been to my hometown fair twice in the past ten years, and the last time I went, it appeared the corn vendor did not attend. That made it a pleasant experience.

I had not thought about people walking around with corn until I attended the recent parade in Three Forks. I was waiting for the parade to start when I saw people walk by me eating corn. In an instant, my “phobia” returned.

Things got worse quickly when someone stopped and took a “selfie” with their corn. It drives me crazy to see people always taking pictures of themselves, and when this was combined with corn, I almost had to sit in the car.

If the fear of corn and walking does make me sound crazy, I also used to get very nervous at parades when I was younger and would see people dressed up in any sort of “old west” or Renaissance clothing. This happened all the time with various groups at local parades and would make me as nervous as the corn.

I don’t think I could make it 10 minutes at a Renaissance Fair, and I’m glad that has never been put to the test.

A few years ago, I was invited by a well-known actor to visit Bannack State Park, where he was shooting a movie. I appreciated him inviting me and taking the time for an interview.

As soon as I walked onto the set, I found out the film was taking place in the late 1800s. I had to hold it together as I watched a scene being shot in a saloon. There must have been 20 takes of the scene, and I was so nervous about the bartender’s outfit. It was well worth the trip, but I had some scary moments.

I’m sure I will probably attend quite a few more events this summer; I hope there won’t be an 1800s bartender walking around eating corn.